Sunday, September 14, 2008

Music: Broken Youth - Nico Touches the Walls

Mood: tired, content

This post is really more for Brenna's benefit than my own, I think. But that's alright XD

It's been an incredibly hectic week, in my eyes - I mean, I DO get to go home at 12:05 everyday, which means I only have three classes, but somehow it still feels like I have no time to do anything else. probably because I work Monday, Thursday and Sunday, hang out with Brittany on the weekend and possibly once during the week, so my time for anything is limited. And then, the looming horror of having to do two seminars within the next three weeks makes me feel just a little more hectic. And I have another assignment due on Thursday, which is also the date of the university meeting (OMG! it's already starting!!!!!!!!!). Oh, and, I have a vocal solo tomorrow, which is a hell of a lot more stressful than it should be.

But I think that's because my music selection is limited. I mean, I have A LOT of music, like, a ton, but when it comes to finding something normal and low key to sing, especially when you need the karaoke/instrumental version, life gets a little more stressful. However, since it's the first one, we don't NEED a karaoke track; she just thinks gr.12's should have it. I think it's because we're the oldest in the class and shouldn't be scared - honestly, it's just hard for me to find a song to sing.

Moving on from that topic ...school pictures were last week! As per usual, I didn't order any, but you know, you need a picture for your student ID, and the yearbook, so I didn't want to look completely stupid. Honestly, I don't look completely stupid; it's actually a good picture of me (which is surprising), but it's the fact that I'm LAUGHING in my picture that makes me look stupid. Because, you know, it's a yearbook/ID picture, not a normal one. So, yeah. It could have been worse though; many of my friends had bad pictures. One's hair looked like it was blowing in the wing; but the pictures were in and the gym, and there was no wind. Another looked like she had 'cheek implants'. It was a good day though; I actually stayed and chilled with them through lunch, and we thought up Hallowe'en costumes. Except I'm going with Britty, but I didn't tell them XD I'll just let them think I'm going to be a part with them XD

Also, Jurita got back from Hong Kong last week, and she also went to Taiwan and Japan!!! She bought me three visual kei magazines form Japan, some charms and GUndam Seed stickers! XDD I was more than happy! XD Real this from Japan! There's even a charm with a yen sticker on it - Britty and I freaked about that XD It's good to have Jurita back; she's a bit of a dork, I guess, but I like she, she's so nice and we get along really well XD

Of course, life is awkward with JIll at school; she WAS in my first period class, but she dropped it. A little part of me thinks it's because I was in the class, but that's just egotistical; I think it's just because she doesn't do history- she didn't take it last year >.> At photo day though, she was at the table helping the teacher, and since I was kind of scared to go, so I just shoved Danielle in front of me and went to the teacher XD But she glared at me the whole time >.> Like REALLY glared: met my eyes and just glared, I was actually kind fo creeped out. ANd while I was waiting for my friends, she just kept like, staring/glaring at me, and it was kind of awkward because I was with everyone and laughing and stuff and she looked so ANGRY. I told my mum and she told me to be careful, because she thinks JIll is mentally unstable and has problems. Which she does XD Honestly though. And while I was waiting for Crystal and Jurita to get their pictures done, I was just standing holding the gym door, and she got up to leave, looked where I was holding the door, and just WALKED THROUGH THE OTHER!!!!! How immature is that? I mean, I even MOVED so she could walk through, while still holding it XD

Oh well. Life is good without her. Like really; most people have said I seem happier without her around. I also think that's it's because of many other things (pills, Jorden, Britty, friends, life) but that is a part of it, for sure.

Speaking of Jorden, I absolutely LOVE having him here; I know a lot of siblings don't get along very well, and it may seem kinda of pathetic, but he's honestly like, on of my best friends XD We went to my Grandma's on Friday, and I was like 'woah, this is cool, Jorden's with us,' XD. It's so nice though. I told him we were weird for being so close, but then he said that out ex-step brother and sister Luc and Lianne were (still are) just as close as we are, so it's not that bad. And it's true, they hang out a lot, and are friends with each others friends. So I guess it's not too weird.

And so, that's really the mostly important things of my life. I think XD

(Brenna, I'll try to be on tonight XD The next free night I have is Tuesday, unless I go to Britty's which I doubt, cause she has a long day at school the next day XD)

what we could have been, 3:06 PM 2 comments .

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Music: CRAWL - Veltpunch

Mood: sleepy, dissatisfied

My biggest concern of the half hour is that I need to change my layout. A new season means a new layout, in my eyes XD

My biggest concern of all time, however, if the feeling of loneliness and the thought that I'm missing out on what's supposed to be a fun-filled year with friends; celebrating the fact that this is our last year of high school before being turned out into the world. Except I'm left feeling uncontent; with my friends, job and life. SOme people spend all of their free time with their friends, while I spend my free time reading and trying not to die.

It's amazing how nothing changes, really. My friendships have change, yet the situation never changes. Somehow it's good, and somehow it's bad. OR maybe it's the cooling air and the loss of the warm summer air that's making me feel this way; fall is one of those romantic, happy seasons, in my eyes. To me, fall feels like you should be partying it up and have fun and enjoying what you can before you're locked inside with work.

But really, I guess it's all a result form my need to make more friends. I really want to meet new people,e make more friends and have a chance at a relationship. Somehow though, I feel like it won't happen this year XD I think I should get a new job though, on the other side of town; then I can work with people from other schools.

Otherwise, my life is good. My father caved, and my brother officially lives with us; though we are broke from the lawyers. Jurita is back, so I have entertainment at school. Britty and I are as close as ever, and my schedule rocks. Three periods, then I can go home. It's amazing. Next semester I have a spare first period, which I am not trading for ANYTHING, because god, I would love to be able to sleep until eight every morning!

Of course, there are downsides; I have no locker, Jill was sending homicidal glares at me today (scary, for sure. Really...), and I have gained weight. With all the stress and cravings that have been going on, I haven't had the chance to lose weight yet. But now I think I'm back on track. Hopefully. I'm going to go for a good long walk tonight though...

The other bad thing is that I haven't talked with Brenna in FOREVER. (I WILL BE ON TONIGHT FOR SURES UNTIL ABOUT 8:30, AND ON FOR SURE ALL TOMORROW AFTERNOON/ NIGHT!!!!!!! FOR SURE!!!!!!!!)

I have so much I want to say to her.

And sadly, homework is calling, so that's what I'm going to do. It's weird;I haven't done real homework and god knows how long.

. . .I'm sort of excited XD

......it's sad, I know >.>

what we could have been, 5:39 PM 2 comments .

Monday, September 1, 2008

Music: 88 - LM.C

Mood: satisfied, slightly anxious though

School starts again in three days! TT^TT;; It's so sad, really. I don't even know where the summer went! And for like, on of the first times ever, it was like, the best summer I've ever had! (Disregarding like, one week of it, but still). I don't want school to starts again, even if it means going into my last year and finishing high school forever (I'm like, uber excited about that, actually!). Still though ...

It's kind of bad, because for whatever reason, we got the same lockers we had last year, which sucks MAJORLY because I shared with Jill last year, but we're not friends at ALL anymore XD She was kind of like the female version of Shayne, so, yeah. For those who know, enough said, really. But like, for whatever reason, Josh didn't get his old locker that he had last year, which means I can't get the one he used to have, which means Im going to have to go around and ask someone to share with me, or ask for a new locker XD

It's so stupid; people don't always stay friends for a whole year XD

Anyways, I suppose other from that, school won't be SO bad. I somehow have to extra credits, so I can drop two courses this year if I have to XD I'll probably only end up dropping one though, so I can have a spare in both semesters. Speaking of which, I don't even know what I'm taking this semester, because they post your homeroom on the cafeteria windows, you go, and THEN you get your schedule.

...I hope I get a first period spare XD I would love to be able to sleep in like, majorly. Or even last period, because then I could just go home and start my homework early XD *sigh*

On the other hand, I FINALLY bought a pair of flats that actually don't hurt my feet, and somewhat fit properly XD They're like, a black and white plaid, and they're soo cute XD But at the store I was at, they don't have half sizes, so it was like, I could fit the eight, but it was tight because I have wide feet (sadly) and the nine was wide enough, but it's too long XD But I settled for the nine. However, it makes me happy to know that my feet can fit an eight, but they're wide so I need 8.5. It's just reassuring XD

I also bought another sweater form American Apparel! It's grey this time! XD (Britty, Jorden and I went to Toronto on Friday, and then Jorden and I went again while my parents went to the CNE; I've been there a lot lately XD). I also bought JOrden one, and in return, my mum bought me this really cute pink and grey sweater from D-TOX (pink, I know; I don't mind pink as much as I used to XD). Also, since I didn't need much school supplies, I got a new bad too! It's white, and it has a pink adidas logo on the front XD It sort of makes me like like a sports poser or something, but I like the bag XD

I also had to take my job back at Tim Hortons, which sucks. A lot. But oh well, at least I'm making money again.

(oh, and brenbren, when you read this: YOU DIDN'T COME ON ON THAT MONDAY NIGHT! XD So tell me another night you'll be one XD We SOOO need to talk! XD)

what we could have been, 11:50 AM 1 comments .